Monday, April 29, 2013

I’m Back!

So, last week my computer died… Died as a doornail my friend died. We didn’t get the blue screen of death, oh no.. we got the “there is a corruption in the operating file”. OMG! It took all week but my sweet hubby was able to bring it back from the dead! Yeah!!! So, I’m back to write again!

I’ve been doing a lot of reading lately. I made a commitment to myself about a month ago. At church we were challenged to think about things we think we could do better, choice one and then write how this one thing would make our lives better. I have many things I feel I could do better, but one thing I’ve neglected for many years is my personal scripture study. I made the commitment to myself that I would read for at least 5 minutes everyday. The problem I’m finding is cutting myself off after 15-20 minutes. I have found my mind is more open. I’m a finding I feel impressions of things to do.

For example, last week I just felt like I needed to follow Riley to the bus stop. I don’t know why. But I did. Or I just felt like I needed to go up and see Allen at work. He said he really needed this. I figured if I’m willing to follow the Spirit, then I will have more impressions.

I have been trying to find one thing I can make better each day. One thing I did was hang a pretty picture in my bathroom. I wanted a place I could go and get a little recharge. I took this picture when the flowers were blooming. I love it! It makes me feel happy and calm.

Beka's Picture 032

Last week I took Riley to another doctor appointment. And it was a frustrating waste of my time. And it made me angry. And it made me sad. And I didn’t feel like a super Grover mommy at all.

This mommy thing can be hard sometimes. It’s hard to hear there is something wrong with your sweet little boy, and that the only thing they (doctors) can do is give him a pill that may or may not help. And to know that a pill was not going to be an option. He wont take it. And to have them tell you that this was the only option, when all the research you have done says that it is ONE treatment. Just one option, and one that is risky. It’s hard. And it’s hard not take my unhappiness out on little miss talking none stop or when the baby is screaming, or when the kids start fighting! Big deep breath! I can do this. I believe the Lord will help me do this.

I read this week a wonderful thought. The author said that she prays to love what God loves. I love this! It inspired me to write this:


A Mother’s Prayer

Lord, let me love what you love!

‘Cause right now it’s kinda hard.

The dishes in the sink are piled up

And someone just pulled his sister’s hair.

My feet are sticking to the floor

The baby has a poo

All around me is messing and loud

And I’m feeling overwhelmed.


Lord, please let me love what you love!

Those little sticky hands

The runny noses

The messy rooms

The crying and whining…

Oh, wait that last one was me!

I’m trying to find the joy

In the little things all around

So, Lord please help me

I know it can be found


Lord, please help me love what you love!

Let me see my babies as you do:

The noble ones sent by you.

Help me teach them to be brave

And kind and respectful too

And not be frazzled when things don’t go our way.


Lord, let me love as you love!

Help my voice touch their hearts

In a soft and gentle way.

Please let your sprite guide my footstep

Along my motherhood way

Lord, let me love as you love!

Thanks for reading! I hope we can all find joy in each day. That we can find a way to change our world! With our kind Heavenly Father and Jesus, all things are possible! So, get out there Super Grover Mommies! We can do all things!

1 comment:

  1. Thanks for your post. I love your poem. It"s easy to feel out of control- especially with a baby! I think it takes me a good 18 months to feel like I have things under control again after baby... and then I get pregnant and it starts all over again! These toddler/baby years are tough, but I hear they don't last forever.