Summertime is in full swing here. We are currently in the middle of a heat wave of epic proportions! I understand that I live in the desert, and it’s going to be hot… but 118, 120? That’s really too much! It’s been crazy. Crazy I tell you! My poor family has been stuck inside, which is a very unnatural thing for them. My sweet kids love to be outside. So, what is a Super Grover Mommy to do?
Well, let’s start the day the heat wave came to town… It happen to be cub scout day. As a committee, we had decided to have a pack field trip. I had set one up for my little wolf den and invited the rest of the pack to come along. For cub scout ignorant: Den-a small group of boys the same age (7 year olds-tigers, 8 year olds-wolves, 9 year olds-bears, 10 year olds-webols); a group dens is a pack. So, I knew I would have at least 7-10 boys, a couple of parents and a couple of leaders going with me. And my 4 kids. We were going to the Old Mormon Fort, and it was going to be 102 out there. We had made plans to meet at 10 AM at the church.
At 9 I felt I really need to have a cooler with water, Capri suns and some snacks. So, I load up my kids in the van and went to Sam’s Club… And I was stressed. I knew I only had about 30 minutes to get everything done, and I was worried no one would show up, or what if more kids showed than we had seats for, what if something went wrong… Yeah, I was a stress case. And my kids felt it, reacted to it. Between the heat and mommy being cranky it was a no brainer that they would act up.
Every time we get somewhere I open the doors, unbuckle Beka, then walk around the van to get Ephram. I expect the kids to get out and meet me at the back of the van, at which time we go into wherever we are going. So, on this particular trip Beka got out and started walking to the store and Riley and Emma didn’t want to get out. They were to busy fighting. Sam’s was pretty much empty (expect for cranky old people) and the parking lot was too. They finally jumped out and as they were, a lady zipped into the parking spot RIGHT NEXT TO US. Really, I thought. A dozen or so parking place all around and you had to park right next to my car? But whatever. The kids were safe and finally coming and really, I was in a BIG hurry… I now only had 25 minutes to get everything done. So, we speed into Sam’s, ran over to Wal-Mart and got back into the van… and there on my windshield was a note. Oh, no! I thought. Some one hit my car! But no this was not that note.. oh, no. As I read the note, I got mad. Some one had the audacity to write something so rude when I was trying so hard to do the good… To not yell, to make sure the scouts were safe, to teach my kids the right things, to keep them all safe. So,this note read something like this: You kids nearly got hit. You need watch ALL 4 of your kids, not just 2.
Nice, really. And I kinda lost it with my two oldest, that were, by the way, still fighting in the backseat. And I wanted to just sit there and cry. Don’t I watch my kids, was I neglecting them, am I a bad mommy…. But I couldn’t just sit there and cry, I was on a very tight schedule. So, I pulled myself together and went to the church. I was so glad I’d brought the drinks. We had 10 boys come! It was a really good turnout. The people at the fort were really nice, and it was fun to see how bricks were made… And at the end of the field trip, I lost Beka. She had decided she wanted to ride in the stroller. When mommy said no and started walking with the scouts down to the visitor’s center, she sat herself down on the ground. Then she noticed that no one was waiting for her. And I didn’t notice that she wasn’t with us until we were leaving. Sigh. One of the rangers brought her down. Apparently she had found some shade and was screaming.
So, more guilt… I’d lost my little girl at the museum.
Anyway, heat makes this Super Grover Mommy not so super… At least not that day. But, I’ve been working the 30 days challenge with the Orange Rhino. Each day (expect Sundays) she sends a little email with advice and tasks to do. On this particular day, it was about lack of confidence. That often we get in our own way, that the thoughts in our head are stopping us from reaching our goals. When I say to myself “I’m not a good mom! I just keep screwing up, I suck” well, guess what? I do, I’m not and well things just suck. When I say to myself “I CAN do hard things. I’m getting better everyday.” Even something as simple as I think I can! Guess what, I can, I do, and things suck less (sometimes things do suck and that’s ok, but we don’t have to stay there) So, I put my anger at the nasty lady’s note up on facebook (and got some super nice comments which made me feel a little more super) and let it go.
The next day (Friday) I knew we were in for SUPER stupid crazy heat. There would be no playing outside. So, I got the kids in the van early (it was already 103) and went and got a movie and wii game at a red box, stopped at the dollar store for things to do inside. Then we hunkered down to escape the heat. We had fun playing together, snacking together, and taking it super easy. We even had fun making water/oil fireworks. Actually, we made water/oil/food coloring fireworks 3 times… but that another story. And after the sun went down, we went to Grandpa Leavitt’s pool. Emma swam the whole length of the pool. This was epic. Two years ago, she was so afraid of the water she would scream and cry when we would go. She wanted to be held the whole time. She was SO scared. Scared to the point you couldn’t reason with her. And she was scared on Friday. But, after a little coaching from Super Dad she did it! Afterwards we talked a little (she had said some not so nice things to me) I told her that she was a amazing. That she can and does hard things! And tonight, for the first time, she jumped in to the deep end. I heard her saying to herself, “stay calm and think. you can do this” She is amazing!
See, little Super Grover Mommy in training!
We all can do hard things. Like learning to make each day, each moment a little better. And sometimes the hardest thing to do is to let go of the negative thoughts. Thoughts about myself, thoughts about my kids, just let it go. And then I can enjoy the moments like watching Beka’s face as the color began to explode in the water.
With another week of temperatures over 110, what is this Super Grover Mommy to do? Love my kids, try to make it fun, let go of believing I’m not good enough, and maybe some bubbles.
I can change my world! One moment, one choice at a time!